Moving Beyond Black and White Thinking and Learning to Live in the Gray Area: Using Floortime as ABA Tactic

Once a child is becomes more competent in his or her ability to think multi-causally, the next focus of higher level social-emotional thinking is the capacity to understand the gray areas of life. Adolescents and young adults with Aspergers or HFA are especially prone to hitting an emotional rut when speaking in terms of “never” and “always”—hallmark terms associated with “black and white” thinking.

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“He never calls on me during class” or “She always gets to play the game first” are common phrases that parents or peers hear when the speaker’s ability to think and feel in more varied degrees is constricted. Not only is this harder to negotiate socially for the partner, but it’s not a very fun state for the black and white thinker either. Such polarized patterns of thinking can lead to social isolation brought on by the extremity of the speaker’s emotional response.

How I Overcome Obstacles with ASD and Steps How You Can as Well

by: Maverick Crawford III

Autism or Autism Spectrum Disorder is a neurological disorder with a range of conditions characterized by challenges with speech communication, non-verbal communication, social skills, and repetitive behaviors. The word “spectrum” refers to a wide range of differences, challenges, and strength each person with autism has. Studies show that 1 in 88 children will develop autism, and it is the fastest growing disability nationwide. With this statistic, it is important for school officials, doctors, counselor, parents or anyone to fully understand the overall needs of children with autism. Adults with autism make up about 1.7% of the college population with an 80% incompletion rate. The main reason for these numbers is that most colleges, unfortunately, do not understand how to accommodate the needs of students on the spectrum.

Challenges facing those with Autism:

  1. Organization problems: College students on the mild end of the spectrum may tend to misunderstand social and communication cues. When it comes to a student with Autism either living independently or with family, can struggle because it more responsibilities all at once can cause an overload. The duties of managing homework, job, independent living, maintain health, meetups for group projects can all be overwhelming with trying to plan and organize it.
  1. Self-Advocacy: The main shocker for high school to college transition is that it is up to you to convey your needs. In grade school, you parent, teachers, and counselors decided and advocated your educational needs. Once the child becomes a teenager (high school age), they are allowed to sit in their IEP (Individualized Educational Plan), but they do not fully understand their accommodations. Most colleges do not require IEP’S, but they do require the students to understand and advocate for their needs.

Dr. Temple Grandin: Practice Prior to Drivers Ed

AS101 Driving with Autism

Though driving with an Autism diagnosis is not for everyone, many do decide to obtain their driver license and go on to live independent lives. Aspergers101 teamed with Dr. Temple Grandin to provide helpful information when considering if driving is for you, or your teen.

Long before driver education, Temple suggests first mastering your skills by practicing on a bicycle (coordination, motor skills). Then tackle driving in a safe remote area such as the country or large parking lot. You’ll begin mastering such challenging tasks, such as multi-tasking, prior to any driving on congested roadways.

One suggestion she has is that before you take a driver education course, you need to find a safe place and practice, and after that, practice even more! Getting the ‘knack’ of driving includes working on your coordination, motor skills, and multi-tasking which all come into play when learning to drive, even more so for those on the autism spectrum.

Sibling Friendship and Aspergers: When Childhood Friends Outgrow Each Other

I don’t know if telling this story will date me, but I guess it doesn’t matter that I grew up in the sixties. I remember as a child, that song and story about Puff the Magic Dragon. The special friendship he and Christopher Robbins had together, but then the boy grows up and Puff hangs his head and cries. (Or was that Tom Dooley and Winnie the Pooh? LOL) Anyway, my kids have been best of friends since the beginning of time and long before that. My daughter, Carmen, and son, Jesse, have a sort of love for each other that I pray every day never ends. They even have a secret language and I often hear them babbling away together and cracking each other up with their private jokes. My son looks at his sister and her funny little ways and I can see it in his eyes that she brightens his day, and he her’s.

childhood, siblings, friends

In just the last couple of years, this has been a growing concern for me. They are getting to an age where most siblings just can’t tolerate the sight of each other. Luckily this hasn’t been the case in my home, but I see something else occurring. My daughter has been developing in a more sophisticated way than my son. Her speech has greatly improved, her social skills are growing in leaps and bounds, and she is succeeding in general ed classes.

I am sad to say that in some ways, she is leaving her brother behind.

Autism Does Not Define Him

Our son Sam is now 22 years old. Together we have discovered Autism first from a stage of confusion, then diagnosis and ultimately the journey toward understanding and adjustment.  This journey hasn’t been taken by just Sam or me. The education and life-changing decisions included our family of four and those whose chose to remain linked to us either by love or simple curiosity. Autism became us. As we learned to navigate the education system, employment and higher education, we’ve taken you along.

Through our website Aspergers101, together we have reached for stories of enlightenment and searched to navigate our next stage in life. Now at age 22, driving and nearing college graduation, Sam has reached a personal plateau that bares sharing. With an absolute delivery he declared, “Autism does not define me”.  He further went on to explain that up til now, he would introduce himself to educators, peers or the seldom few who initiate conversation as “Hi I am Sam…and I have autism.” He felt he owed them an ‘explanation’ for his social awkwardness, his lack of eye contact or his seemingly bland behavior.

Handy guide for everyone involved: neurotypicals and Aspie partners/kids

by: Marcia Eckerd, Ph.D.

This is an excellent guide for communication. As a parent of a son with Autism, I had to ‘learn’ to communicate with my son. This lesson of communication was learned both from the both of us….a neurotypical and an Autistic mind. The article below, by Dr. Marcia Eckerd, touches on a topic we could all better apply…that of communication.  -Jennifer Allen/Aspergers101

Why don’t people and their interacting style come with manuals? Parents and partners often misunderstand or don’t know how best to talk with someone with Asperger’s, and people with Aspergers can have trouble understanding and communicating with those who think differently than them. If you are the neurotypical partner or parent, you need to understand what different processing is like, with different needs and expectations. And the same  is true for those with Aspergers who are finding it difficult being with the people in their lives. Everyone must take the importance of understanding seriously.

Here are some rules for neurotypical partners or parents of Aspies:

  1. Understand that your Aspie often won’t necessarily understand your need to feel gratified by connecting. He or she might go to an office/room and ignore you, for example. This doesn’t mean a lack of caring – it means that this meets his or her needs, and he doesn’t get it that you need something more. He may see your need as a difficult demand if he needs some space.

Q&A With Lisa: How do I get my child qualified for special ed?

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Q:

Dear Lisa,

“I suspect my child has autism or some related disability. He is in the early elementary years. How do I get my child qualified for Special Education services in public school and what do they offer?”

-Confused and Concerned in Texas

A:

Dear Confused and Concerned in Texas,

Thank you for asking this question that many others surely have as well. I will do my best to clarify the referral process from a parent’s perspective and possible services. However, you are always welcome to contact the campus Principal and/or the special education department of your current campus/district and present your question to them directly. Their response will give you an overview of the process which I will outline in this article through multiple resources and a flowchart.

Since you have mentioned that you suspect autism or some related disability, I have also included a resource that might help you to clarify your concerns in those terms if/when you do make the phone call to the local special education office.

A Man Worth Meeting

We want you to meet Maverick. A man who inspires anyone, diagnosed with Autism or not, to live to their potential no matter the circumstances. It will make you rethink what you believe are obstacles and hold compassion for others whose journey came from a road less traveled. We think he is a man worth meeting! – Jennifer Allen/Aspergers101

My name is Maverick L. Crawford III, and I was born in April (same month is Autism Awareness Month).  I remembered how odd and wired I appeared to be compared to my other siblings. My behavior starting at six months was repetitive and restricted, every day I would hide from everyone and not play with my siblings.

I want to help, support and inspire others on the autism spectrum to not give up or lose hope no matter what you are going through, keep pushing, keep striving, keep persevering to the end there will be a greater reward.

Maverick L. Crawford III

The movement of doors as they open and close was fascinating to me. Any of my toys that were rectangles, I would stack in a specific order as high as possible. If I were not playing with toys, I would entertain myself by hand flapping and be flushing the toilet and watching the water flow down the commode. As a child, I would stay to myself and not respond to my name.

When my mother or siblings touch or find me somewhere in the house, I would have a temper tantrum.  I would suck my ring finger through the day and night as it provided a sense of comfort. Early in my life, I could not understand social interaction (and try to avoid it), nonverbal communication and never maintain eye contact. My mother did not fully understand what was going with me and relied on doctors and professionals to deal with my issues.

I was born an abnormally thick line that connected my tongue to the bottom of my mouth, which is called a tongue-tie. The pain from this tongue-tie was unbearable so much, so I had trouble eating and keeping food down without getting sick. After years of the pain caused by this deformity, I had tongue clip surgery in 1999 at the age of three. Later that year I was diagnosed speech impediment, mental retardation, dysphasia (serve language and speech disorder), autism, attention deficit disorder and having multiple seizures. Being a child with various disabilities like autism brought stress upon my mother because she did not know what approach to take in dealing with the issues I had. Me being the only one with multiple disabilities out of my sibling, I felt like a stranger in my family and unfortunately treated differently.

During a Meltdown

In previous blogs we have addressed the complex topic of meltdowns. While the main message is to have a plan to PREVENT a meltdown, we must also be prepared if a meltdown does occur.

Portrait of unhappy screaming teen girl

I will start by outlining what NOT to do. I think this is best said coming from someone that has lived through a meltdown with neurological implications.  The following is an excerpt from a message from Mr. John Scott.